Like most Americans, I’ve been struggling to make sense of the terrible events in Newtown last Friday. I’ve watched my friends on Facebook line up on either side of the gun control issue, reflect on the need for greater mental health resources, and urge some kind of action to hopefully bring an end to the awful cycle of violence that seems to have trapped our society.I haven’t participated in any of this dialogue. I can’t find anything inside me, except terrible, terrible sadness and a profound sense of helplessness that there’s nothing I can do to help the families that are suffering. Right now I only want to grieve.Grief isn’t an emotion that’s welcomed in the workplace. I learned this for the first time on September 12, 2001. After a frantic evacuation from the high rise building I worked at in Chicago the day before, we all returned to work the next day with (gentle) orders to try to carry on with business as usual. I worked at an international public relations agency, and our clients needed us. So I joined a meeting about a new project I had been assigned to – developing a media campaign to promote the use of low-flow toilets. I don’t think I’ve ever felt less of a sense of purpose in my life.It probably goes without saying, but I didn’t want to talk about toilets on September 12. I wanted to express the sorrow that I was feeling and that I knew my colleagues must be feeling too. I don’t remember anyone crying in the office that day, and I don’t remember hearing much more from management than a simple acknowledgement that it was going to be a tough day for everyone and we needed to get through it.Excessive expressions of emotion in the workplace probably make most people uncomfortable (including me), but national tragedies are different. When the president is crying on national television, it’s a safe bet that many of us are feeling broken, too, whether or not we’re saying anything about it. And while business is business, companies are run by human beings. There should be a way that all of us can feel safe acknowledging and expressing the grief we’re feeling – and then move on to the business at hand as best we can.Today when I got to work, I couldn’t help expressing my own sadness to my colleague, Anna. As mothers of young children born three weeks apart, neither of us can imagine the pain the parents in Newtown are feeling right now. We both got a little teary talking about it, and then eventually went on with our work. In some tiny way, this made me feel better.Newtown, you are not alone.